I didn’t go to the ladies‘ room to change.
And I definitely didn’t go back to the party.
<
I walked straight to a side door and got the
heck outta there.
It had been cloudy all day, and now it was
raining a fine, misty kind of rain. It was late
spring, not really cold.
I just walked out without an umbrella. It felt kind.
of liberating.
When I got back to the house, the housekeeper told me, all smiles, “Mrs. Baker, your mother-
in–law brought little Ethan over! He’s waiting
for you.”
My heart jumped. I practically ran inside.
My first year of marriage, I had Ethan. But
Ben’s mom said my body had taken a beating.
She decided she was going to take care of him.
She took him when he was a month old.
was a mess, half–healed and totally
eartbroken. I didn’t have the strength to fight.
All I could do was go crying to Ben.
ended up getting one day a week with my son.
It was all I had, and I cherished it.
But time flew by, and Ethan grew up, and I grew
more and more distant.
3
As I came up the porch, I heard all this happy
noise coming from inside.
Ethan was driving a remote control car around
the living room like a pro.
Ben’s mom, the housekeeper, and the nanny
were all gathered around, clapping and
cheering.
I moved closer, my eyes locked on my little boy.
く
Ethan glanced up at me, then kept on playing.
I waited for him to be done, then crouched
down to give him a hug.
But he turned around and ran straight to Ben’s
mom.
“Grandma, I saw Mommy, I want to go home
now, let’s go home.”
He grabbed onto her leg, all lovey–dovey.
Ben’s mom just laughed and picked him up.
“Okay, sweetie, let’s go.”
I still had my arms out, ready for a hug. They
just hung there, holding a big empty space.
I guess I’m always a little slow on the uptake,
like I didn’t feel the hurt until I was halfway
home from that party.
<
Ben’s mom had taken Ethan and left. I was still
crouched on the floor, and the tears started to
roll down my face.
It felt like there was nothing, no one, keeping
me here.
It was late. I went upstairs and packed a bag
with my stuff.
All my important papers, and personal things.
Everything else could stay.
I glanced through the back door at the
crabapple tree I’d planted the year I married
Ben. I always loved it.
I stared at it for a couple of minutes, then
walked away. No looking back.
